As I stood at the graveside…

As I stood at the graveside, at the funeral of my brother Brian.  A funeral I had taken. A friend who had come to the funeral said ‘you got your religion, Christ. I got mine, the NA, it’s what gets us through…or we’d be buried by now.’

I nodded, I agreed. That’s timeless. All the fights against addictions we have had throughout our lives made sense here at the grave. Together we could talk of religion in agreement of our shared human experience. I have now studied Theology- doctrine, creeds etc, he has come through the NA, here we may not agree on the incarnation of Christ or say Buddha, and I did not go through the AA or the NA, but our hearts knew the truth as it had been revealed to each of us and in that we could agree…  

I’ve watched 13 friends die through drink and drugs over the years and now a brother.  When we are stripped down to our bare humanity. When all the peripheral stuff is cast aside…it is easy to talk of God and not fall foul to our limited understanding of God in our own denominations and ways…I guess that’s part of experiential religion… staying true to how God has been revealed and made known to us through reason, experience, traditions and scriptures, for me this is primarily in the incarnation of Christ… but being open to interpreting God at work in others…

Son of God, if thy free grace again has raised me up, called me still to seek thy face, and given me back my hope…

In sore temptation’s hour; Save me with thine outstreched hand, and show forth all thy power…                                      Charles wesley

Are you yet alive?

 The aim of this blogg is to start a rolling conversation about life as an addicted people drawing on the twelve steps of the AA and the NA and the response to the creator God. It will attempt to do this from a spirituality rooted in the ‘Methodist movement’ of temperance and the pursuit of Christian perfection.

It took a long time… At last driven in desperation, I came upon a field, my addictions and my memories tearing away at my inner self. I fell to my knees in mud and water and looked upwards and groaned a prayer from the pit of my mire…a prayer that could reach heaven or hell…

                                                                            

Whats your temptation? Whats your addiction? Whats your fight? What keeps you from living? 

I found a way…a prayer in faith

My prayer hath power with God; the grace
Unspeakable I now receive;
Through faith I see Thee face to face,
I see Thee face to face, and live!
In vain I have not wept and strove;
Thy nature and Thy Name is Love.  Charles wesley

                                        

 

Do the memories of the past tear a hole? Can you let them go? Do you want to let them go? Whats holding you back? Living in fear or are you not living at all?

Long my imprisoned spirit lay Fast bound in sin and natures night; Thine eyes diffused a quickening ray- I woke, the dungeon flamed with light, My chains fell off, my Heart was free, I rose, went forth, and followed thee. Charles Wesley